Just Married

Hey Guys,

I was thinking about people who are married, but not married. I guess how I have been dating a guy I'm not-dating. Thats so funny to me. (If you don't know what I am talking about read yesterdays blog.) Anywho back to these so-called married folk. First, we have my father who has been married twenty years but been planning a divorce for about 10-15 of those years, until this year. Now he's decided to chalk it up and keep her around. So they act more like friends and roomates than anything. Sometimes they sleep in the same bed, but you hardly see them interact. Then there's my beautiful aunt who lives in a big beautiful house, has a beautiful husband and sleeps in a big beautiful king-sized bed, alone. Her husband sleeps down the hall. They haven't slept together in ten years. TEN YEARS! But when you see them together they act like a happily married couple. wtf?

So yesterday I was talking to my cousin; she took note of how me and Uncle Frank* work together like a married couple. Everything looks and operates like we have been doing this for years. Well, we did do it for everyday for a few months. My lil girl was gone for the summer, so it was nothing to stay at his house everyday. If I tried to leave, he'd act like puppy dog. "Where you going?" "Why you can't just sleep here?" "Why you gotta go home?" How can you tell a cute lil thirty-EIGHT year-old no with that baby look in his eye no? Im a sucka for a kid. I was telling my cousin thats how it was before verse two of "A Little Bit" except we were intimate then.

OMG! This fool started holding my hand last night while were watching TV. I was like what is this about? Then he dropped my hand with the quickness when my lil girl started coming down the hallway. I almost died on the inside it was funny. I had to call my cousin and tell her about that. Oh then this morning he wanna spoon and shit. What is this not-dating relationship coming to?

Well, I am going to Bible Study today. I hope the speaker don't be lookin at me today. He's married and I vowed to leave these married men alone. How will I ever have a respectable marriage if I don't ever respect the institution of marriage. I have one guy who is seperated that I dated last winter. I told him I can't be in a relationship with him because he is not available to marry me. I am getting to an age where I do not need to be courting for sex or temporal needs/wants. I need to be courting for marriage. And at the moment I feel I cannot be married to a person I need to roll on. Do I see myself possibly marrying the guy Im not-dating, Uncle Frank? I don't know. Like I've said before, we work well together as a household, the two of us and the three of our children. I can't say. I never intended to be in this position or the previous with this guy. Plus, I am supposed to be marrying this guy thats incarcerated. My father is gun-ho about me and this guy. Niether of us hold this season against him. We'll talk about that in a later post.

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5j5NgbKV-Pg

[Miss}underSTOOD